The Voice of the Walls

4:47 PM

This past week was my long awaited spring break! I didn't have a plan for it until my friend's father asked me to paint another mural for him at his pool supply store. At first, I questioned whether I wanted to paint this mural because I had been so emotionally and mentally exhausted from midterms and school as a whole. I really wanted to rest and not do anything that would take up my energy. But, I needed the money for my adventure in Japan (I was offered a job to teach English and I accepted!!!) so I said yes. Turns out, this mural was what helped me have one of the most restful weeks I've had in a while.

The space he wanted to paint was a display area for the pool cleaning machines in the store. My friend's father wanted me to draw something with those machines, so I sketched out a few ideas to show him. After he said yes to a design that I liked, I started to clean the area, take off the shelves, buy the paint and get started. The first day was as tiring as I thought it was going to be. I've only been doing calm yoga lately so my body wasn't exactly prepped for all the moving I had to do that day. Feeling like the clutter you see in the photo, I cursed myself for saying yes to that mural when I could have been in bed resting.

The second day I was more prepared. I had my music, my podcasts that I mentioned last week, a bag lunch and a good attitude thanks to the beautiful weather. I started painting while listening to Jess and a couple of people that specifically talked about intention. They asked questions like, "what do you want?" "What makes you happy?" "What are you doing, actively, right now in this moment, to achieve that?" And more outcome based questions such as "Is getting the outcome really what matters most?" Jess and her interviewees would talk about how being intentional and mindful about these questions should be brought more into the present moment. Being present and being intentional about decisions and life changes. I started to ask myself these questions while I painted.

When I would come home, I sat in my bed and read my former professor (now a friend and mentor)'s old photo diary called Talking Barnacles. He had suggested me to read all of it because it had a lot of wisdom, so I jumped right into it. His style of writing is very comforting and I felt really relaxed reading about his life after the earthquake on 3/11 in Japan. After 3/11, his life went through a huge change, and he would ask himself similar questions like the ones my podcast would. Not only that, but he would write about his feelings as he felt them, and the events that occurred that day. It was inspiring and really nice to read a little slice of someone's life day by day. There is something beautiful about the everyday that people tend to miss.

On day three, I had started noticing how much better I was feeling and figured out that it was the combination of being deep in thought and analyzing my life with Talking Barnacles and my podcasts, while also painting very mindfully. I didn't rush because I knew the mural would be done by Thursday, so I was really able to feel at ease and in the moment with every stroke. There was nothing but me, that wall, and my thoughts.

I realized that I hadn't had a serious time to myself in a long time. Hustling everyday to get a job in Japan, the past few months have been fun but also a bit of a struggle. When I accepted the job all of my running around stopped very abruptly. I think I forgot how to live my life presently and I didn't know what to do. But, thanks to this mural, my online life coaches, and my faith, I was able to find that rhythm again; the rhythm of living in the present moment.

I'm ready to tackle and really enjoy the rest of my senior year.

Here are process photos: