Bottles of Mana

2013 taught me that there’s no one who’s going to hold your hand anymore. 2013 taught me to stand on my own two feet and say, “no more.” 2013 taught me to be honest, even if it hurts. 2013 was rough and, to be honest, really weird, but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. 2013 toughened me up. 2013 helped me see who’s a real friend, and who is not. 2013 helped heal my broken heart. 2013 was a battle, but I’m ready to do away with war. To 2014: I’m ready to be me.

I am ready to put 2013 behind me. In ways I'd like do think that this year has made me a bit jaded about life, and possibly less trusting. But in other ways I'd like to think that I became a lot stronger because of 2013. I believe that things always happen for a reason, so despite 2013 having a lot of negative events in my life and in the lives of those who are close to me, it happened for some cosmic reason, and we have learned from them. 

I'm not a push over anymore. I mean, I am still a little too gullible for my own good which doesn't help me when I'm teased. HOWEVER, no longer do I just do what people tell me. I am my own person and I now know what is good for me and what is bad. When something in my life becomes toxic, I learned to just take a step back and reflect about it. These are the lessons that I'm thankful for from 2013. 

Here are some final happy moments before the end of this year:

Ed and I went to NYC to have a Christmas date <3 I had such a great time walking in the city with him! This was the first time I've been to the city on my own without my parents besides NY comic con so I was really excited to walk the city with Ed on my own :) 

Everything was so pretty, I had never seen the city during Christmas time before! I probably did when I was little, but who remembers that shit. NOW I HAVE MEMORIES. I was smiling so much omg. So ridiculously happy being there with him. I'm really happy we got to spend the holidays together <3

We ate at this Japanese restaurant and their ramen was TO DIE FOR. We didn't speak for a good five minutes because we were too busy eating the deliciousness of this ramen. 10/10 would eat again. We decided it was on par with our other favorite Japanese restaurant, Tsukasa.

Look at us being stupid. 

The next day I went to one of my best friends house to see her and her precious horses!!! Her family owns a horse farm so I got to spend time with the new horses and some horses that she spent her whole life with <3 This is oscar!! He is a hugger, so you know I just had to jump in and give him a hug. HE HUGGED ME RIGHT BACK I WAS SO EXCITED LOOK AT HIM WHAT A CUTE!!!!!!

I got to ride Rosie <3 Her personality reminded me of my mother, which made me love her even more. She has the same stare that is like "who are you. and what business do you have with me." I look really weird here but not to worry, I was trying to focus on my friends instructions on how to ride Rosie without her thinking I was a complete freak :) 

Her house was beyond beautiful and I was so happy to have had time with her before I leave for Japan <3 

THIS!!!!!!!!! My very first Pandora bracelet <3 One of my friends has one and I didn't really see what the big deal was, but the more I thought about what the charms really mean for the bracelet it made sense to me. I never thought I would get one though, I never own real jewlery like this. My type of jewelry is like.......target. BUT THIS WAS A CHRISTMAS PRESENT!!! My face lit up when the clerk put it on my wrist. I am still wearing it <3 Thank you so much Ed <3 This is a present that I will treasure forever! 

I dyed my hair for Japan and send a picture to my host family In Japan! I look more like my mother with this hair, which is a little scary but at least I look more mature! (My baby face fools no one)

To be honest, I am done with 2013. I need this year to be officially over in the calendars, and I need a new beginning. I don't need new things, or new people in my life (I am perfectly happy with who I have beside me.) What I need is a new sense of self, and a new mindset. So here are my resolutions: 

1. Do away with envy and petty jealousy. I find myself very jealous about things that I really shouldn't be jealous about. I want to get rid of this bad habit. 

2. Be more compassionate and mindful. I learned a shit ton about mindfulness this semester, psychologically and spiritually, so I really want to put my knowledge to good use.

3. Even if there is no time for art, make time. This semester was the worst with forgetting about art. I never want this to happen to me again. 

4.Continue to work on loving myself. Self explanatory.

5. Hoard less things.  One of my fears is that I'm going to end up on TLC's worlds extreme hoarders. Those people buried under their shit until they realize that they left a piece of bread in their closet for 20 years is going to be me. 

6. Meditate at least once a week. This one is a stretch, but the meditation I did this semester really made a difference for me so I want to try and keep going.

7. Read a book for fun. A college student's biggest challenge. 

8. Learn to cook better for Christ's sake. I need to learn more dishes other than macaroni and cheese. Who ever marries me will shake their heads in disappointment. 

9. never stop being me. I have the tendency to hide who I am for the sake of others. It's time for me to stand proud.

10. Never stop speaking Japanese. This might be easy.

11. Work hard in school. Obligatory resolution 

12. Don't cry over spilled milk. I am biggest cry baby. THIS MUST STOP.

13. Pray. I stick to my faith

14. It's okay to wear your heart on your sleeve <3 

Goodbye, 2013.

This Christmas, I have to say, has been one that I will remember. Not because anything crazy happened, but actually because of the opposite! I really got to relax and enjoy my family this Christmas. I went to church the night before, so I was able to loaf around the house Christmas morning. I got to watch Santa's magic as my little bro opened all his presents and played with his new toys. He was having the time of his life, and I would've watched him play all day. 

The presents I received were also very thoughtful and I love them all! Here are some things that I received this Christmas <3 

I got a bunch of Em Cosmetics stuff from Michelle Phan's black friday sales <3 I was so happy to finally open my life palette and the samples I bought! 

I got the Love Life Palette, because I really love the soft pinks in it, and there's at least one look with a natural palette ! I loved my warm fuzzies sample so much that I had to have another life palette sample. This time I got the city glitz sample! The travel size life palette case is so pretty, and I really love that I can change whatever colors I want in the case<3 And of course, I am in love with the pillow plush lip balm that I got from last months ipsy glam bag, so I needed to order another one. This round I got a dark berry color! 

The gifts that I got from Santa <3 He knew that I didn't have a Japanese calligraphy set after watching my psych class project video (I used a watercolor set for the project) so this calligraphy set was very very nice. It looks so legit I don't even know how to begin with it. I'm going to Japan very soon, so Santa thought it would be good to give me a set of nice chopsticks to (REMIND ME OF HOW SAD ILL BE ON THE PLANE) carry around in my bag when I'm out places! I don't know what I'll do with the rice paddle, but I can worry about that later. I'm wearing that scarf right now because it's cold as Antarctica in my house (thanks, Santa. P.S please turn the heat on in the house) My brother got me piglet because he knew I had tigger and pooh <333 I WILL HUG  THIS PIG FOREVER.

My friend Sarah went to a little town with her family and found these for me! I really cant wait to drink that PINK hot chocolate. All I want is for all my foods to be pink. The green tea candies really taste like a green tea latte its crazy!!! I already opened it at her house I couldn't help myself. Don't mind Perry the platypus, he's just there for blogging support. 

Deanna gave me this, and I can't stop squealing about it <333 It was funny because, we went to McD's to get some coffee and hot chocolate and exchange gifts. While we were waiting for our order I notice her wearing this fox necklasce that I had never seen her wear before and my first reaction was WHAT IS THAT. WHERE CAN I GET ONE. Little did I know that she had gotten me the bracelet version!!!! I am too obvservant for my own good. THEN!!! She got me this beautiful coach wallet/ coin purse!!!!! I am going to use this all over tokyo <3 She knew how hard it was to keep change abroad, because everyone besides the U.S pretty much just uses coins rather than cash. My American wallet was not enough when I went to Japan for the two weeks. I carried like five wallets for cash, cards, and coins. BUT NOW!!!!! I will be using this cutie <3 Thank you so much Aneki <33 

I gave Deanna and Sarah gifts as well and to go along with those gifts, I drew them these Christmas cards<3 It's been a while since I really drew or colored anything, so getting back into the drawing groove was a little rough. But I'm happy I got to draw something for them before Japan <3 

I have been playing LoL for a while now with the boyfriend and recently have gotten a lot better at the game!!! I am still nothing special but I love playing :3 As a part of my Christmas gift he got me a skin for Sona, and Lulu!!! I screamed and smiled so much because he left me the nicest comment on the digital treasure chest that accompanied my new champion <3 TuT <33 It was Christmas Eve when I got them so I was really giggling a lot like a nerd. IT DOESN'T TAKE MUCH TO MAKE ME HAPPY, AS YOU CAN SEE. We're going to NYC this week for our Christmas date, so I am sure I'll be even more smiles and blushing.

I've been having fun with makeup and eye shadow palettes like the picture on the left. It was snowing that day so I put lots of sparkles on my face. Today I used the life palette look: "All Yours", and I am in love with the perfect saturation the eye shadows had in order to achieve the perfect "All Yours" look. Beyond impressed, Michelle. 

I know Christmas and the holidays in general aren't all so happy for some people. For some, it brings bad memories and often enough, with all the family that comes, drama also occurs. I hope that those people were able to find some Christmas spirit or happiness in someone by their side, or were able to enjoy the day in some way. I am so blessed to be able to spend my Christmas's with my family and the people I love. This Christmas was really the most relaxing and enjoyable Christmas I have had in a while <3 

Either that or I'm just getting old and becoming extremely hormonal. 

Love,

Mana <3 

I got my October ipsy glam bag and I've been using that coconut lotion every week. My skin's very sensitive to lotions so I have to be careful when using new products on my face. Thus, I refrained from using the h2O+ moisturizing gel. The lip plumper made me realize I really like that dark, maroon-ish type color on my lips. My lips are already full, so I don't need the lip plumper part, but I really like the color. The hair spray was something I needed to have in my inventory, mostly because I don't own hair spray when I should. I've heard zoya is a good brand so I'm sure this nail polish is great, I just haven't had time to sit and slap it on my nails. This bag is so cute <3 I can't wait to see what this month's glam bag will be! 

It's finally fall here at Bryn Mawr, and the whole campus gets flooded with fall colors for only a few weeks. I never really get to take pictures of the campus because I live here, but each season is so beautiful here. I often find people who live in the area here, admiring how beautiful the campus is during the seasons. Some even hold weddings here!! 

Fall aslo means halloween. I was a bro at our halloween acapella concert (before halloween) along side with some of my friends who are also (redundantly) bros. We bonded on how our pinnies made no sense.

we went to a bar the next day and apparently it was Villanova's home coming, so we were between lots of novas. My favorite part about this picture is the guy on the bottom left. He looks very happy to be there.

November 1st was Pretty Light's day of the dead concert with a sick line up: Candyland, Seven Lions, and Krewella. It was such an amazing concert and I got to see all my favorite producers live. I had chills, I was screaming and the bass went so hard I couldn't hear for the rest of the night. We all got back with a shit ton of glitter all over us and we smelled like concert. I got into the shower as Ke$ha that night.

          

     

 The next day my friends parent's took us out to a really nice dinner and drinks!! As college kids it's a good day if we can get some good meat at the dinning hall, so this really was an awesome treat for us ;w; I tried warm sake for the first time, I'd be lying if I said I didn't make a face at the first sip. The more I drank it, though, the more I liked it! It also was freezing that weekend so the warmth of both the drink and the alcohol going down felt really nice :) 

That tuna tar tar was ridiculously delicious. Nectar, was the name of the place only about 20 minutes away from Villanova. When we get the money the three of us are definitely going to go over there again wow.

This fucking game. has been my addiction for the past month. THIS IS A PICTURE OF MY FIRST TEAM CARRY AHAHAHAH. It was against AI's but whatever. I was proud that I wasn't the one dragging the team down. 

 

And with an addiction, comes FAN ART. On the left, I doodled a picture of one of the champion's new skin that is about to come out. She reminds me of Vexa but with bigger breasts. On the right is Annie and Tibbers! A champion whom I still have trouble using even though she's supposed to be easy. I wanted to draw it as a Halloween picture but I ended up not having time :T 

   

I got a new tote bag for school with a gift card for Amazon that I recieved! It makes me feel like an adult because it's actually leather and not crappy quality that I usually get 8) I've also been having fun with make up and outfits to go with the make up. Michelle Phan is one of my inspirations for these types of things. I'm not really into fashion like those who enjoy designing clothing, but I really have fun with what I have to brighten up my day a bit. I feel better when I've put effort into dressing up, not for other people, but for myself. I'm really trying to get into these self-love, self-compassion concepts, because I know I lack in that department.

 

That's pretty much what I did this past month, in a nut shell! Skipping over the anxiety over tests and readings and work to do, it was a pretty good October spilling over into November. I'm excited for Thanksgiving break, so that I can be with my family and hug my mom, and eat delicious food, and just breathe for a couple of days until we get back for the rest of December, and finals week. (((WHEEZES))) I try not to look too far into the future now-a-days, and try the best I can to live in the moment. My 360 program is to blame for this, but I do find myself having less stress when I focus on each moment in my life at a time. And in this moment, there are three lady bugs in my room right now, and I don't know what to do with them. (((I named them)))

Love, Mana <3